I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
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