I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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