i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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