This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
