scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
So many bounce houses so little time
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize