I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize