She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize