I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
