in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
