belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
That's intense
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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