he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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