got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
