There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize