remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
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