OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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