Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
