And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
