I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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