i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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