i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
