Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Randomize
