Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
