Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
