Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
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