You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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