she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
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