Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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