phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
