Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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