her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.