And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
organizing the empties. That sober.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Randomize