im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two words: blizzard sex
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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