I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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