In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
