I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Swine flu is the new snow day.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
