Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
