mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I am spending my child support on dildos
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Randomize
