I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
