i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
