Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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