Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
