..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
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I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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