How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
