: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
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