I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I need to calm my uterus...
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
