Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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