He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
