I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
