McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
A+ Viking dick
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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