We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
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