Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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